Best Friends’ Farewell to Dan Horkheimer

Monday 20 August 2007

I’ve known Julie Jakimczyk and Tony Hilken since 1999. Tony is a Rock of Gibraltar at Karen House; over the years, many of my SLU students have benefited from his savvy and guidance. Julie has been my and Joanie’s dance teacher since last October; her enthusiasm as a teacher is sans pareil.

They both loved Dan Horkheimer, as was so piercingly and humorously clear to those of us last week at his funeral. Dan was blessed to have such friends. And their sense of blessing is revealed in this eulogy from August 15th.

May we treasure our friends–daily.

Julie: Here’s our best attempt at a goodbye to our best friend.

Tony: We think the closeness we felt to you, Dan, correlates strongly with the number of nicknames we had for you. For example, Danno, Danorama, Book ‘em Danno, Booksie, Wooksie,Wooksie Rungie, Runge…Thanks for answering to all of them.

Julie: Personally, I have to mention that Dan and I were very often teased for how similar we were-–certainly not in a way that was meant to compliment either of us, but secretly, I was always very flattered by the comparison.

Tony: We had such deep respect for you, Dan. You struggled along with us trying to make huge life choices.

Julie: Like what IS the right thing to do?

Tony: What is peace?

Julie: What can we do that would actually be fun?

Tony: You and Courtney were so much fun for us. We loved to laugh with you.

Julie: And I loved you for being one of the few people, unlike my husband, who actually laughed at ALL of my jokes.

Tony: We know you were the butt of many of our jokes –

Julie: Whenever anything went wrong with the two of us and Courtney and Dan, we blamed Dan.

Tony: Though, really, it was because you were so intentional and deliberate, we knew you were the least likely of the 4 of us to have fumbled.

Julie: We will miss you so much!

Tony: We couldn’t possibly explain in these 5 minutes all that we will miss about you – But we will at least list a few:

Julie: Your concision. Dan could say more in one syllable than the rest of us could express in a week.

Tony: Your horrendous phone skills–and late nights with Larry Chapman.

Julie: Drooling over plants and garden design books with you.

Tony: Hearing how you saw the world.

Julie: For reminding us that “No one’s too cool for safety.”

Tony: Your unrelenting gentleness.

Julie: Hard labor –besides laughing – it was what the 4 of us did best together.

Tony: Your bad posture.

Julie: Your ridiculous laugh.

Tony: Your love for natural beauty.

Julie: I’ll speak for myself on this one – Worrying, Dan and I were great worry buddies.

Tony: Your quietness–even though we were always pushing you to talk more.

Julie: That you were our young-un.

Tony: Your genuineness – if only everyone could be so real and genuine.

Julie: And your rational, thoughtful outlook on both the beauty and the horrors of this crazy world.

Tony: Dan, we are so sorry we never took you clubbing!

Julie: I think we all knew Dan best by his actions.

Tony: So, we know how much Dan cared about us by how much he was a part of our lives.

Julie: The absurd idea of a home that we managed to conceptualize would never have been realized without you, Dan.

Tony: We already had so many plans that we didn’t get to fulfill – meeting up in Boston, Winter Park, A LOT more work projects – and . . . exit strategies –just in case. We looked so forward to sharing our future with you and Courtney.

Julie: We planned to grow old with you, Dan, and we are devastated that you were stolen from us. You leave us with immeasurable gratitude for your friendship, support, laughter, and example.

Tony and Julie: We love you.